Jason Gibbon is a loser! Apparently he's telling everyone my dad is a creepy stalker who follows me everywhere, and that he interrupted us having a private moment and punched Jason in the face.

First of all, we were not having a 'private moment'. Jason was sleazing all over me and I punched him in the nose because apparently 'leave off' means 'please keep trying to kiss me' to him. Jason's house is like 7 minutes from mine, and I called my dad when Jason started being hideous. And Dad never laid a finger on him.

So, Jason Gibbon, just shut the hell up. Your pathetic attempts to save face are ridiculous, obvious and desperate.

My dad is the awesomest dad EVER.

Dad's not getting better and I'm totally wigging!

We went to McDonald's today and I totally lost baby Thomas in the ballpit! It was SO funny! He was fine. But oh dear god that place is nuts and the kids go crazy bollocks and Dad looked like he was trying very hard to ignore the face that 'Playground' really means 'GeRmGrOuNd' where kids run around sneezing and then putting their hands on things. He had a O_O look most of the time! I did watch him give Anna and Caleb some of his hand sanitizer before they ate. And he handed a random kid some tissues and the kid looked seriously brassed off. He's so funny. I love my dad. Though I don't think we'll be going to McDonalds again any time soon :D

I'm fourteen today and apparently my step-mother has stopped acting like a total bitch, which is good news because now Dad's walking around like this ~~~~> :D!!!

( See! Proof! )

Haven't seen that in a while.

Dylan's taking me out tomorrow, and I got SO many presents and it's totally awesome. I love birthdays! Kismet, want to come spend the night?!

Wow, y'all have nothing better to do when things suck than fight. Get it together, people. Shit. I'm a few weeks short of 14 and I can see y'all are mental.

Anyway William has to go away for a little while, but Dad's all !!!!! because of Alastair :( and Aly and Johan and everyone. And so Liz wants Robert here. But Emma isn't sure Robert will help Dad and they're like totally planning out everything and I just miss Uncle Thomas because he could make Dad feel so much better with just a smile.

( So I found this )

He's dancing. And he if can die a horrible death at 25 and still smile, don't you think you all can pull your heads out of your arses for thirty seconds and try it?

I know I'm fourteen and I never had a boyfriend or girlfriend leave me, but I did have my mum kill herself and that was after she kidnapped me and neglected me because she loved her H. I'm not a kid and I'm not stupid. You all are the ones acting like children. Who cares who is with who or who was with who first? Just move on.

I'm sick of feeling like I'm surrounded by fucking kindergartners arguing over the last eraser shaped like a kitten.

So Dad went to see Aly today and apparently now Aly wants a SePaRaTiOn. She went off the biff and stold shite and got arrested and then tried to kill herself -HEY THANKS THATS WHAT LYDIA NEEDED!- and now shes in the Nuthouse. And she wants to leave Dad. She belongs in the goddamn nuthouse.

Poor Dad is so depressed he's just sleeping. But he isn't drinking. He bought stuff but he gave it to Johan, who is now drunk and hilarious. He's doing German dances. And he's really good at them! Anyway, looks like we're staying here for a while because Aly broke Dad and he wants to be around Aunty Elizabeth. It's cool with me, I lived here before so I like it.

Apparently Aly wasn't eating or anything. I did that for a little while. Then I fell off my horse because I was dizzy. I don't know if Dad knows that. But damn it was stupid and I was 12 and she's like..30-old.

Whateva, I'm so sick of her shite I hope Dad marries someone awesome. Like a supermodel! He deserves a supermodel.

I've seen some fucked up shit in my life, but that had to be the fucking worst. You expect demons to hurt people. And my mother was a junkie so of course she's going to be off her stupid head and lashing out at people. But that woman has no excuse. My dad is the awesomest person on the planet and to be hit by someone who's supposed to love him? It's so not on.

And when Aly hit him, he didn't even care, he just asked if someone had messed with her because he was afraid she'd been hurt, and she said she'd rather have that happen than have Dad touch her.

Seriously, what the fuck? Someone stole her brain, for fucking serious.

Hey.

My step-mother's being an arse so I'm staying at my aunt's. But Dad says I can stay with you sometimes if you want still. Just not tonight because he's sad.

Oz said the show is starting to film next week. How are you doing with all of that. Are they setting up yet? It must be so fucking weird.

So my little sister is sick and my parents are acting like fucking teenagers.

Fucking awesome, guys. Keep it up, maybe you'll inspire me to act like a teenager too.

My grandfather is here and he called me a bastard child.

I told him he was just a bastard full-stop, and I don't think he was too impressed with that.

Honestly, he can get fucked.

I'M THIRTEEN!

I should totally go out and snog some boys to celebrate.

Just kidding, Dad.

Is my dad on drugs or something? He's being very weird.

If he is on drugs I do not apprecite it!

Dad sang with the dog from Oliver and he told us not to tell anyone hee!

Dylan woke up!! He's all okay now! YAY!

I feel like shit today which is not good because I have a competition tomorrow!! I need to be at the top of my game. Arghs. But I love Dylan's new little sister! Her fingers and toes and all of her is so cute! Her name is Moira and Dylan is adorable with her. And I love my new little sister too. I wish she was here more often. Even Svetlana...it'd be okay with me if she were here more often too...

My parents wedding anniversry is coming up on the second! And I'm going to help Hope and Tasha babysit so they can go away and have a nice time! I think they totally deservet hat!

I made some friends at school today! Casey and Brianna and a few others, but after school Casey and Brianna and I talked about horses and stuff. And I showed them my pictures of Sebastian and they want to meet him! Brianna has five horses and a stable at her HOUSE. She doesn't live there during the year though because it's in the country. She lives with her Aunty and Uncle during the year because her dad does business. I said my dad owned a hospital and they thought that was cool.

Anyway, I have homework to do 'cause we talked through the expiriment and now I have to make it up. Teachers are SO lame.

Okay I am BORED of being at Grampa and Gramma's now because all she does is FEED ME! And ask how I am and cry and stuff. And then she talks in Spain talk. I want to go HOME and be with Mum. I'm taking care of Thomas though which is real good because Thomas seems to cry alot. He never cryed before. I think he misses Dad.

This is SHIT. Shit shit shit. And I told my teacher on the phone that it was shit and she got real shocked because apparently 'students that attend London College do not use that sort of vocabulary, young lady'. Which I think means she's full of shit too. And I am not a lady.

I miss my Daddy. Why won't he just wake up?

Last night I slept in daddy's bed and I told him I'd protect him because he said he was scared. He doesn't like being all tied down, but I think mummy and Abby and Uncle Thomas and everyone made the right choises about doing it. He doesn't remember ANYTHING and it would be bad if he forgot to look both ways before crossing the street and got in a coma AGAIN. When daddy woke up I fed him ice cream and read him a story which he said he liked though he might have been lying and then I went to school where Hayley told me all about this thing she went to on yesterday. She said it was awesome. And Dylan told me about Caitlin's wedding and we held hands in the cafeteria.

Daddy's asleep now so I can't show him my booklist, but I will later. I know he doesn't remember me right now but if I keep acting like normal, maybe it will help. Mum said I kept him calm and I felt proud!

London College is stupid and I miss Anna and Caleb. But at least Dylan goes there so I see him in lunchetimes. I met a nice girl named Hayley when I dropped my bag. She's 14 and she was telling me all about stories she wrote and I said I wrote stories too so sometime I'm gonna go over to her house and read them. I saw Hope in the halls but she was busy so I couldn't talk to her. I hate school. And Anna said dad bleeded on her from his nose. Which is gross.

Mum bought me an iPod so I listened to Mortiis and Rammstein while I walked home from school. That part of the day was oaky.


I miss summer. And I wish dad wasn't crasy.

I hate my grandparents. They're stupid. But Aly is nice because she came to be with me when mum was buryed even tho she wasn't actully allowed. She loves me and I love her. And then Tasha took me to Transformers which was cool because a lot of stuff blows up and then she gave me the best Mortiis posters in the world for my room when I make it all new. Dylan came over today and he bought me more Mortiis albums too. The ones I didn't have. Deirdre helped him find them. And Caleb and Anna spent the night in my room with me and we did mad libs which are SO funny even though I had to help them with what all the things meant and then we played and they made me smile a lot. I'm really sad still but people around me are being really good to me. So thanks.

I have to go to my mother's funeral tomorrow. It's going to be weird.

I listened to daddy's Rammstyne CDs tonight. Deirdre gave them to him and even though I don't speak German like he does I really like the music because it's loud and sometimes Mortiis is loud to. I don't know what my favourite song is though because I don't understand the titels so I don;t know which is which. I like them all. Then Caleb and Anna watched a movie so I stayed in my room and drew a picture that went with the songs I herd.

Tommorow I have a morning class with Sebastian. That will be fun.

UNCLE DAVID IS MARRIED AND I HAVE EARRINGS!!!!

Tasha's back which is good even though she can't talk which isn't good. I'm sorry I was so mean last night. Dad talked to me and he said it was probaly because I was upset because I knew Tasha might feel what I felt when my mother took me to France and he was probaly right so I shouldnt have said what I said. I shouldnt have called Svetlana a bitch or called my dad a jerk. Because my dad is not a jerk. And Svetlana's trying very hard to be nise now and she has a pretty smile.

Dad says I can't watch movie night because I said mean things but that's okay because I can read with him anyway. My daddy is great. He didn't send me to be without supper witch is scary and I don't like it but he said he never would because he loves me.

Pretty soon it is summer and I get to take extra classes with Sebastian and we're going to learn jumping!

Maybe I could read Tasha a book so she doesn't get board!

No one ever tells me ANYTHING!

Deirdre bought me all the Mortiis CDs yesterday! She and Dylan brought them over after she went shopping at Stephie's store! Stephie was there in Paris when I got rescued. She's real nice. And I love Mortiis so much! And Anna and me danced around to him all day and daddy plugged his ears are ran away! It was SO funny! And Caleb says he thinks Mortiis looks like a 'villian' but I like him. Thank you Deirdre!!

Mummy's home which is really good because she almost died but she's better now! I missed her alot. And my mother is out of jail and she's trying real hard not to be stupid again. That makes me happy. It's not good when she's stupid and I don't want to get taken away again. I'll kick her all over! And then my boyfriend will lance her! With lances! He told me about lances.

My new baby brother is the best baby in the world! Though daddy says I can't dress him up in my doll's clothes, which isn't fair because I rekon he would fit! Daddy showed me how to hold him, though we're only supposed to do it while sitting down for right now. He says he can't hold his head up. I would be very annoyed if I couldn't hold my head up.

My birthday is in 2 days and I am relly sad because mummy is still sick and she can't be there. Daddy says we can visit her in the hospitil during the day, but Thomas can't come because he could get sick so he has to stay with someone at home. Probably Auntie Elizabeth. He doesn't know if mummy will be awake and I remember when daddy wasn't awake and that sucked a lot. I wish she would get better.

Soon I will be 12 and then I can go up an age group at my equestrian events and start competing in the jumping competitions! I amd very exsited and Sebastian is too!

Anna says so is Ludwig, but he just looks asleep to me.

Anna and I had a sleepover last ngith and it was SO fun! We will doit again tonight because Unlce Thomas is sleeping in Anna's bed! He's a princess! I want to dress him up! He and daddy could have ribbins in their hairs!

Kat is sick but we will help make her better like Mummy and Caleb!

I got to see my mummy the other day and I showed her Dylan's picture and she said she liked him very much! Caleb and me are trying to train Petey and Raphael to be circis dogs. We're teaching them lots of tricks and stuff and it's really fun! I hope daddy and Uncle David get home soon because I miss them! But Aly lets us stay up late on Fridays!

I want to show you my pets so you can see them! Tasha and Hope are teaching me to do this and I am very egsited! And I can't waite for daddy to come home!

( animals! )

This will be my frist Christmas with Daddy and my new Mummy! I am so exsited! Daddy said we had Christmas together before but I was a baby so I don't remember because I was a baby. But we are going to have a big party here on Christmas Eve and then Santa will come and then we will have a Christmas just with us! Caleb is going to dress up like an Elf and Anna and me are Snowflackes!

Daddy and Mummy are going to Irland on Monday but they are coming back for Anna's dance resital! It is on the 22nd! Are you going to come Uncle David!? She practises in the mirror all the time and she is verry good!

I want a horse for Christmas! A big one that is pretty and I want to name it Pickles!

I had my horse show and I got a blue ribbin and daddy says I did magnificentally! Then after the show daddy was going to take us for ice cream becuase he said I did so good. I was sad Ally was not there thogh so insted I said to buy the ice cream and we colud eat it with Ally in her room and we did! It was very nice and everyone was happy and Dylan gave me a kiss on my cheek and said I was a beutiful princess on my horsie!

Daddys home and I get a new little brother or sister and daddy and aly are gettin married and I get to be a flower girl with Anna! So many things are happening and yesterday Deirdre was on our roof and I don't know why she was on our roof but then she came home with daddy and now she's in the basement with Renee and Kaiyt. Hope and me and Anna and Caleb and Daddy and Aly are in the lounge room and Aly and daddy are giggling but I do not know why.

Daddy might come home! I can show him my schoolwerk and he will be proud! And I have a horse show coming up in November and he can see it and I am getting relly good!

Dylan's coming over for dinner tonight and his mum is coming over too and she's going to spend time with Auntie Elizabeth and Auntie Emma and Aly after we go to bed! Sleepover!

Daddy says I get to keep taking horse classes here now! He is the best daddy ever! He looks funny thuogh. He is relly thin and stuff but he says he is okay and happy for us to be home and he was sorry to send us away! I like being home too and soon we will go to Caylebs school!

I am lerning to ride horses here! We get classes in it and I am very good. I am just doing troting now but they said that if I keep doing it I can learn all the other gates and I can do jumping maybe! I love it and I want to keep doing it forever!

I miss daddy though. He called and said he loved me yesterday and that was nice to here.

Anna and me have to go to a boreding school because daddy says it is not safe here anymore. Anna is very angry and daddy yelled at her! That was skary. I don't like it when he yells. I think it might be okay. I will try to not be sad their.

I miss unlce Thomas.

My sister is moving away and I am very sad. I dont want her to move away becuase I love her and it is not faire!

Started school today. Caleb was there to. He is nise.

I want my daddy back now.